I seem to be having a bit of a tecchie few weeks – feeding my
inner nerd. I have been listening to
classic 1950’s science fiction (Asimov, Heinlen, Bradbury etc) and signed up
for an online computing course. The
technology has changed a bit since my last attempts in this area: which were
Fortran programmes on the mainframe of Nottingham University saved on 5.25”
floppy discs in ca 19hundredandalongtimeago.
Now I can even wrestle with the Python code used on the course on my
iphone!
Has Papa Latte gone fully digital and embraced the virtual world
– well not entirely – just making sure I can keep pace with Junior (not yet 2
but a very keep ipadder) for as long as possible!
Identity in a virtual world can of course be manipulated for not
always constructive ends, and having spent the last few weeks being the digital
doorman for those wanting entry to the hedonistic, trend-setting, celebrity
rich coolest club in town - that is the Hamburg Mothers Meeting Facebook group
(of course) - this has become much more evident to me. But hold on a minute I hear you cry – you are
yourself an interloper a man in a mothers group?? – Readers I can only put this
down to the benevolence of Madame President Lou who has given me exceptional
dispensation to be considered a honorary woman (no surgery or hormone treatment
required) whist I am within the state of Hamburg. Plus I would point out that I did fess up in
advance about my embarrassing maleness.
Those trying to Phish there way into the group are not so
straightforward – but fortunately mostly relatively amateur. Choosing a profile picture that looks like a
cross between Angela Merkel and Hilary Clinton doesn’t immediately say mother
of littlie, and membership of 5 random, unconnected and indiscriminate Facebook
groups but having no friends speaks of an unusual approach to social life that
is unlikely to result in procreation.
The dodgy ones are obvious as are the genuine, but there are always
those who totter around in the corridor of uncertainty. These totterers normally collapse under a
barrage of detailed forensic questioning – example ‘when did you move to
Hamburg’. The Phishers from China are
the funniest: profile pictures of buxom scantily clad young ladies, and
sex=male!
So if you are approached by someone whose gender claims are
questionable take care– it could of course be innocuous – me (in my honorary
capacity) or a dedicated Kinks fan on a night out.
Ok fair enough – even with world class hair, make up and
prostethics: I’m unlikely to pass for a lady even in poor light, but then as
the surprising futurist Ray Davies anticipating the internet in 1970 put it:
‘Well I'm not the worlds most masculine man
But I know what I am and I'm glad I'm a man
And so is Lola’
